Mucho odio para todos


Esta es...la Lista...

sábado, 14 de diciembre de 2013

Odio tu consumismo excesivo

Soy una persona a la que, fácilmente, se la puede sacar de quicio. Si alguien ronca, me darán ganas de ahorcarlo, si alguien hace ruidos molestos con la boca, le amenazaré con golpearle, si alguien no me escucha cuando trato de darle una orden tan simple como "Has tu puta cama, imbécil" me enojaré tanto que subiré mi voz de tono normal a joder-me-estás-cagando-los-tímpanos.
Y, sin embargo, soy una persona que podría tolerar fácilmente muchas otras cosas.

El consumismo excesivo no es una de ellas.
Tampoco soporto el 'Ay-quiero-ser-bella' de algunas chicas.
En serio, gente, what the fuck?

Digo, si, está bien que compres regalos a tus niños para luego mentirles y decirles que fue un gordo vestido de rojo que ha entrado mágicamente por la chimenea y se ha largado en su trineo-jodidamente-grande impulsado por renos-jodidamente-rápidos.

Pero estar comprando como un imbécil durante cinco horas seguidas zapatos que no utilizarás en toda tu puta y miserable vida, ocasionando consecuentemente el suicidio de tu novio que, obviamente por estándares morales, valía millones de veces más que todos esos zapatos juntos, es una completa estupidez y deberías sentirte avergonzado, peor aún si usas el argumento de "Ay, es que me arruinas mi Gaynividad si no me compras estos pares de tacones que usaré para el Baby Shower de Lucy" para seguir comprando, Lucy ni siquiera está embarazada, Lucy ni siquiera existe.

Es irritante ver que la gente se comporte así. Y no, no estoy siendo hipócrita, que yo llevo usando el mismo par de zapatos desde inicio de año y no me he quejado. No, tampoco soy pobre. Cállense y déjenme explicar.
¡HO HO HO, HAZME RICO!
Agh, y lo peor es que este comportamiento irracional se ve potenciado por las empresas que quieren que les llenes los bolsillos con tu rico y jugoso dinero. Vamos, ¿nunca te has preguntado el por qué algunas zapaterías bajan misteriosamente sus precios en fechas en las cuales las personas se dan el derecho de comprar lo que vean sin pensarlo dos veces (aka. Navidad)?

¿Qué? ¿Qué es eso de que me estoy poniendo muy seria? Al carajo, este es mi blog.

Además, algunas tiendas ni siquiera bajan los precios, [CLASSIFIED INFORMATION, YOU MAY NOT PROCEED] simplemente los suben antes y luego los bajan a su precio normal, dando la sensación de que son más baratos, no es como si fuera un secreto internacional, ¿verdad?

Vale, vale, no me llaméis Grinch, que no estoy diciendo que dejen de compr-digooo pedirle cosas al viejito panzón. Me refiero a que, si lo vais a hacer, hacedlo con un poco de cerebro, no compren así como así. Vamos, que he visto niñatos de 5 años con celulares mientras que yo, que tengo 14 años, no tengo nada con que comunicarme, ni siquiera un ladrillo Nokia.

Bueno, no importa, dejémoslo así no más. Porque siempre habrán idiotas que crean que es absolutamente necesario comprar más de once trajes de funeral.
Eyup.
HAPPY HEARTH'S WARMING EVE!
Ha, me acabo de dar cuenta que nunca cambié "El Día del Mes", a saber que pensarán los que sabían de que se trataba...

sábado, 28 de septiembre de 2013

DON'T READ THIS

CAUTION: HORMONAL ATTACKS.

BUT BEFORE THE REALLY SEXY IMAGES, I WILL POST SOMETHING.
FUCK, GO AND MEET A HUMAN.
THAT.

IS.

ABSOLUTELY.

NOT.

FUCKING.

SEXY!!!

SERIOUSLY THE PERSON WHO INVENTED CLOP IS SICK AS FUCK.

NOW, THE REALLY SEXY IMAGES.

I PROMISE I WAS DRUNK...WITH AIR, OF COURSE, AND A HIGH LEVEL OF HORMONES.
Robert Kazinsky aka Chuck Hansen.
DO U KNOW THIS GUY??

HE IS ROBERT KAZINSKY. HE INTERPRETES CHUCK HANSEN, AKA THE SEXY AUSTRALIAN, IN PACIFIC RIM.

AND HE IS FUCKING BEAUTIFUL.

I MEAN WHAT THE FUCK, GUY.
Even with derp faces, he is fucking beautiful.
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, SO MUCH BEAUTIFUL IN ONE PERSON HAS TO BE ILLEGAL.
AKSDKAKLSDAKLLJDAADSS.
OH MY GOSH WHY I AM NOT THIRTY?!
<3333
U DON'T KNOW WHERE DID I GET THIS PHOTO.

AND U DON'T WANT TO KNOW, EITHER.
ROBERT BEING SEXY.
HE IS TOO MUCH SEXY TO BE A SIMPLE MORTAL.
CHARLIE IS SEXY TOO, BUT NOT AS MUCH SEXY AS CHUCK (CHARLIE IS RALEIGH).
U DON'T KNOW MY POWER TO FIND PHOTOS OF HIM.
-HEAVY BREATHING-
FEELS. THEY CAME OUT OF ME WHEN I SAW THIS SCENE.

Herc: Stacker!

-Stacker turns around-

Herc: That's my son you have got there.

-Chuck sees Herc-

Herc: My son.

-Chuck CRIES-

FUCKING GOD WHY SO CRUEL?!
U DO REMEMBER THIS PART? IT MADE MY FEELS FLOW.
HEY.
He knows we are watching.
HEEEEY!
JESUS CHRIST.
NOW SOME SAD THING I HAVE FOUND IN TUMBLR.
"You’re ten. You tripped while you were running with your father, and your leg was hurt bad enough that he carried you up like you were five years old again. He made you close your eyes, but you couldn’t; you watched as buildings you’ve known your entire short life crumbled to dust, and thought, what about my school? What about our house? Your father’s shoulder dug into your chest with his every movement that you’re more aware of your ribs now that you’ve ever been.

You board a helicopter, then you land on a battleship.

You can’t find your mother.

Later, with the words nuclear bomb and Sydney ringing in your ears from the news broadcast set up within the ship, you find your father crying.

You stop looking for her.

You turn eleven, three days later."

WHY U BROKE MY HEART LIKE THIS??

STOP BREAKING MY HEART, YA MATE.

NO GUYS, I'M NOT PRACTICING MY AUSSIE ACENT. THAT IS A ILLUSION, AUSSIE ACENT DOES NOT EXIST.

NOW, A REALLY LONG POST, OF TUMBLR, OF COURSE. TUMBLR IS THE HEART OF THE MOST SAD POSTS ABOUT CHUCK HANSEN. U KNOW IT.
FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.
DAMN IT, GUILLERMO KNOWS HOW THE FANGIRLS WORK. EVERYONE RUN!!!

NOW SOME "CHUCK BEING A HERO".

IT'S A JOKE.

CHUCK IS ALWAYS A HERO.

HE DIED FOR US, UNDERSTAND THAT, U SHITHEADS.
HE HAS THE BALLS TO PUT HIM BETWEEN A KAIJU AND US.
GOD'S SAKE. THIS MAKE ME FEEL SO BAD.

CONCLUSION: THIS POST NEEDS MORE CHUCK HANSEN.
AND HE HAS THE BALLS TO YELL TO A KAIJU, TOO.
"C’mon, Gipsy. Kick his ass!" YEAH, CHUCK SAID THAT.
I WANT A PREQUEL TO SEE MORE OF CHUCK.
I HAVE READ SOMETHING INTERESTING IN TUMBLR WHEN I WAS TRYING TO GET MORE PHOTOS OF CHUCK HANSEN. IT SAYS "No parent should have to bury their child" AND IT WAS SO SAD, I THINK I CRIED INTERNALLY.
"I'm sorry, Angela."
TO MAKE THIS MORE SAD, I WILL SAY THAT CHUCK'S BODY WAS BURNED IN STRIKER EUREKA'S EXPLOSION, SO, HIS FATHER HAS NOT EVEN HIS BODY TO REMEMBER HIM, ONLY A EMPTY TOMBSTONE.

FEELS, GUYS, IT'S THAT HOW IS CALLED.

AND HE DIED FOR US.

REMEMBER THAT, GUYS.

REMEMBER THAT AND CRY.
Prince of sexyness.
HE SACRIFICED HIMSELF TO SAVE US ALL.

LONG LIVE TO CHUCK.

WAIT A MOMENT WHAT DID I JUST SAY??
JUST...NO, COME HERE.
U DON'T KNOW WHAT WAS THE COMMENT OF THAT PHOTO.

IT WAS "BE MINE, ROB. I’ll pet your fluffy hair and read you bedtime stories and shit.". YEAH, NOT KIDDIN', MATE.
HOHOHOHOH, U DON'T WANT TO KNOW WHERE DID I GET THAT PHOTO.
LETS MAKE ROB'S SMILE PATRIMONY OF MANKIND.
THOSE SEXY DIMPLES.

OK, OK, MAYBE I'M EXCEEDING A LITTLE TOO MUCH WITH DOING AN ENTIRE POST FILLED WITH PHOTOS OF ROBERT KAZINSKY AND SAYING HOW MUCH SEXY HE IS. SO I'M GONNA STOP...AFTER MORE PHOTOS.
CHAN CHAN CHAAAAN. EVEN SCREAMING HE IS SUPER SEXY.
KSDKLSDKLADAS.
CARICATURIZED? SEXY.
SAD PHOTO? +50% MORE SEXY.
"No! Don't disengage!"
HERC, FOR THE BLOODY HELL, WHY THE FUCK YOU DISENGAGED YOURSELF?! NOW YOUR SON IS DEAD AND WE WON'T HAVE MORE SEXY CHUCK IN THE SEQUEL.
THOSE SEXY GLOVES.
AND YEAH, CHUCK WAS GOING TO PARTICIPATE IN THE HOBBIT, BUT DUE TO HEALTH ISSUES, HE DIDN'T. FUCK OUR LUCKY.
HE IS STANDING ON HIS TIPTOES AND NOBODY NOTICES IT?!
OH WELL, HE JUST REALIZED IT.
I DON'T THINK I'M GONNA STOP.
MORE PHOTOS, THIS POST NEEDS MORE PHOTOS.
AH' DON'T KNOW U GUYS, BUT IMAGINE IF ROBERT SEE ANY OF THESE PHOTOS THAT I JUST POSTED HERE. WADDYA THINK? HE WOULD BE SCARY OR HE WOULD BE PROUD THAT SO MANY GIRLS WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH HIM? DON'T COUNT ME, I JUST LOVE HIM 'CUZ HE IS SEXY, BUT AH' DON'T WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH HIM, I'M 14, HOLY CRAP.
HERC...IT'S YER FAULT.
I WILL REMEMBER CHUCK IN SEPIA COLORS.
UH.
CHUCK.
CHUCK, STOP.
CHUCK PLS.
CHUCK PLS LISTEN TO ME.
I SAID CHUCK, NO U.
CHUCK ARE U LISTENING?
PLS EXPLAIN.
JUST EXPLAIN.
THIS IS NO U, IT UR ROBOT.
THAT EXPLAIN NOTHIN'. PLS LISTEN 'N' EXPLAIN.
STOP LOOKIN' AT ME LIKE THAT. EXPLAIN.
THAT IS YOUR ROBOT AGAIN. STILL, IS SEXY TOO.

NOW EXPLAIN WHY U ARE SO SEXY.
I HAVE MY OWN THEORY. U'RE SEXY BECAUSE...
HELL, I CAN'T SAY MY THEORY IF U'RE A CHILD. GROWN UP.
NONONONONONONO, THIS MAKES ME SAD. THE COMMENT WAS "What just kills me about this scene is that Max is whining and bowing his head down, as if he can sense he won’t be seeing his master again. And Chuck, he’s smiling for both their sakes, trying to cheer up Max one last time", HOW DARE THAT PERSON TO POINT THIS OUT. UGLY CRYING AGAIN, BECAUSE BLAME YOU, ANON.
THIS.

THIS MAN UNDERSTAND US.

AND THAT'S WHY HE IS SEXY.

BECAUSE HE IS PERFECT.

BRBRBRBRBRGBRBRGBRGBGRBRGB.
SOME OF YOU MAY FORGOT...BUT...IN 14/08/2013 IT'S THE BIRTHDAY OF CHUCK. I KNOW I'M LATE, BUT ANYWAYS, HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRO, SORRY U'RE DEAD.
SO...SEXY -TOUCHS SCREEN-.
I'M RUNNING OUT OF PHOTOS.
OKEY I'M FINISHING THIS.
JUST...A LITTLE MORE PHOTOS, OKAY?
WE WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU.
Ridiculously good looking people | Rob Kazinsky
FUN FACT: THE COMMENT OF THIS PHOTO WAS "Sometimes I want to get angry at Rob. Then I remind myself that no, it’s not his fault he can’t turn off his sexy.".
HIS SEXY, HAHAHA, THAT WAS HILARIOUS.
PART OF A LONG POST.
-SOBS- COMMENT OF THE PHOTOS: "Chuck has been calling Herc “Dad/Old man/My old man” and this is the first and only time he called Herc father.".
LINK TO THE POST IF YOU'RE...INTERESTED.

"Recently I was in bed and something went bang and hit me on the forehead. I turned on the light and suddenly I saw this spider the size of a golf ball on my pillow. I just stood there for about 30 seconds before screaming for my housemate, who just wouldn’t wake up! I was crying the whole time! I got a can of Raid and started spraying it at it, but it went under my pillow! I was absolutely terrified, so put on all my motorcycle gear - full leathers, even my helmet, so there was no way the spider could get through! I chased it around the room for about 20 minutes until it curled up and died. I had to sleep on the sofa until the next day, when I got my housemate to move it."

ROBERT KAZINSKY, YOU ARE SO GODDAMN ADORABLE AND I CANNOT HANDLE IT.
UUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH -MELTS IN THE FLOOR LIKE BUTTER-.
JUST.
STOP. 
PLEASE. 
IT'S TOO MUCH CHUCK TO ONE POST. 
THIS IS GOING TO EXPLODE.
THAT IS.

THAT IS THE LAST.

BECAUSE...

BECAUSE....
YOU MAKE ME SAY IT.

IT HURTS.

YOUR DEATH, IT HURTS. IT HURTS ME SO PAINFULLY AND DEEPLY THAT I DID THIS, A ENTIRE POST DEDICATED TO YOU (AND A DESPRECIATIVE COMMENT TO THE CLOP) AND YOUR SEXY, DON'T TURN IT OFF.

I JUST WANT TO SEE MORE OF YOU. BUT YOU WON'T BE IN THE SEQUEL, BECAUSE YOU'RE DEAD, AND IT'S HURTS.

IT. FUCKING. HURTS.

Why are you dead, bro?? You lil sexy shit. I know it. Because that breaks our hearts.

Bad Chuck.

Don't die.

Too late, you are dead. And it's irreversible.

Just...no.

Why? Why you have to save those shitheads?

Bad Chuck.

I hope you will be alive again.

I want you in the prequel.

It's still hurting.

Bad Chuck.

Don't be dead, bro.

Don't do that to us, mate.

Please, no.

Someone pls use black magic. I want Chuck back.

-Curls up and cries-

-Sobs quietly-

I want the sexy australian back...

One last mensage.
CLOP IS SHIT.